Perfectionism – another lie of “ism”

Perfectionism causes people to have high standards, for both themselves and others, driving them to a performance and achievement attitude. It’s no surprise then that people with a perfectionist mindset are quite successful in the business world. Nevertheless modern psychology sees the downside of such a mindset in results such as fear of failure, anxiety, depression etc. But it is not enough to discover the bad side effects of perfectionism. What is more important in exposing perfectionism as a lie is to find its roots. The root of perfectionism is bitterness and self-hatred. Due to previous – possibly early childhood – experiences of rejection some people develop hatred for themselves. They can’t accept themselves anymore and try to overcome this lack of self-love (as a result of rejection) by trying to perform their actions in perfection. The thinking is that only if they are perfect, others would love them and then they themselves could love themselves. The negative outcome of such a mindset is obvious and described above. More important is to realize that something that starts with rejection and self-hatred cannot be a healthy approach of walking through life, no matter how successful one might be outwardly in their performance. Once the roots of perfectionism are revealed the antidote is obvious as well: Forgiving others for their rejection and starting to love and accept oneself in an imperfect state.